Haunt Me

mid way through my research,
i found it.
the entry in the ledger, written in purple, now stained with tears.

it was there.
i was shocked.
it was clear.

i did...

i held myself under,
shot myself in the foot,
cut my own throat,
did myself in.

i was trembling and couldn't return to the start of the book,
when you would touch my skin and remark upon it's softness.