Haunt Me

tonight, on this december night, a butterfly appeared in my dining room.
it was my namesake, a peacock.
it was very large and my cat licked it's lips and chanced a pounce.
it is the second butterfly that has visited me in the last 2 weeks.
i didn't know what to do.
should i put it outside where it belongs/doesn't belong (in december)
or leave it to bang it's head on emulsioned walls and dodge cat jaws and no hope of any nectar to eat.
it climbed on to my hand, butterflies are good at that unlike a lot of insects who can sense yr a human and avoid you like the plague, and i took it to the cold garden.
i've worried all night.
i wish i'd kept it in the back bedroom.
i wish i'd put it in the shed.
i wish it was july.
i'm the kind of girl who will cry about this until january.
such a beautiful thing, wrong place, wrong time.