i used to love a boy, i was so young.
i waited in my room while he skateboarded up and down the shiny boulevard behind my house.
they built flats that obscured my view, eventually.
i left home and moved into a house full of blonde girls,
so that i could invite the boy to tea. listen to nico and eat chips.
i wore the skirt with the joy division pattern.
my heart was broken and i became full of home sickness.
there was no phone, and no one ever washed up.
there was this song.
on a tape.
i used to listen to it all the time and all it did was make me cry.
one by one, the blonde girls tried to remove it.
along with a long-dead rose, brown in the box.
one day i threw the tape behind a vast wardrobe
but i still thought about it a lot.
i'd watch the boy from the bathroom window,
trying to do pop shove-it's and falling and laughing.
and then the flats went up.